Call The Police…

so it is the end of the night, 2 in the a.m., and I just dropped off a regular, GB, he lives right on the causeway. downtown is literally 3 min. away. that is where my next pick up is at. all the bars closes at 2. by time i get there he is gone. i assumed he took another cab. there is no one about but i called him anyways.

1st ring …. no answer.
2nd ring….no answer.
3rd ring….”call the police, call the police.”
I say, ” Are you okay. Look don’t worry about it.”

I think that he is ornery because I wasn’t there before 2 and he is telling me to call the police on him to get my money.

“I’m on I….. R…. Dr.”

When he gave me the location I knew something was wrong.
The drive is literally a minute from where I was so I start driving towards it.
When I turn what do I see?
My customer, Mr. Epitome of Gay, lying on his back in the grass.
His “I am a loser boyfriend”…is sitting on top of him holding his head.

First thing I think, the dummy that i am, is that he had a heart attack, or he is so drunk he fell, and that he needs an ambulance.

In reality, Mr. Epitome of Gay is saying for calmly, “Get off of me, Get off of me, or she will call the police.”

Now I probably wouldn’t have called the police if Mr. I am a Loser Boyfriend got off of him. But he never did. Didn’t look like he planned on doing it at all.

So as I am talking to 911 dispatch, who by the ways can’t keep up with how fast I was talking, when the sheriff deputy shows up. Turns out Mr. I am a Loser Boyfriend had hit Mr. Epitome of Gay. In the eye.

So I lost out on a fare. Stayed out later to write up a report. and i didn’t even get any compensation for anything. By time I get home guess who calls?

Mr. Epitome of Gay. And he thinks I am his Girlfriend. Now he wants to chat. Tell me what happened. Then I find out while he is talking that he tipped the bartender $20 and he couldn’t give me $5 for non-cancellation. Talk about being annoyed, I was. Mr. I am a Loser Boyfriend ended up going to jail and guess who was planning on bailing him out the next day.

yeppers you got it.
Mr. Epitome of Gay

I guess we should change his name to Mr. Abused Wuss.

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